The Measurement of Success

This year started pretty rough for me.  Anxiety and depression rear their ugly heads as I try to figure myself out and take a sharp left turn in ways of career.  My pride has gotten in the way of making this change as I don't want to sell myself short.  Then I asked myself, where is the line of selling myself short?  My whole life I have strived to be a good provider and hard worker.  I want to be able to look at myself and deem my life "successful."  I realize at this point that success isn't always based on career and how a person makes a living.  I took a line from Don Corleone in "The Godfather" when he tells a slimy drug pusher that "it makes no difference to me what you do for a living."  I've always felt that way toward anyone who works a steady job.  I treat everybody equally no matter what job they perform.  I joked at one time and asked why it is that people with a big job title that make a lot of money are the only ones that ask what I do for a living.  I live a happy life and am surrounded by a ton of people who love me.  I have a beautiful daughter and wife whom I love with all my heart and who loves me just as much.  If you've seen me lately you know I have plenty of food on the table.  I may not drive the newest or best looking vehicle in the world but I love my truck.  My kids (ol dirty) Baxter and Teagan look up to me no matter what.  They may be dogs but I'll take what I can get.  I'm going to end this with a story that changed my life as I saw it.  Years ago my uncle Eddie and I were driving up the road looking for a place to eat.  It was a friday night.  We stopped at a not so big named steak restaurant that is now defunct.  We ordered our steaks and were served the skinniest most pathetic slab of meat we'd ever seen.  As we complained about our pathetic meal I looked over to another table and saw a man and woman who had just finished their meals.  The woman's arms were wrapped around the man and she kissed his check over and over in between her words that made him smile from ear to ear.  Their kids ran around and laughed loudly.  The man had a look on his face of pure happiness I'll never forget.  Point is, what we deemed as a poor experience and pathetic food was probably the pinnacle of this family's week.  I envied the man for throwing his hard earned money toward his family and not at a bartender.  I felt that for the first time I had seen success and that was what I wanted to achieve.  As I continue my journey, I'm sure I'll look back at this point in my life and realize that I am not judged by what I have but who I am.  Gotta go, headed to the county dump.  I look forward to going every week to yap with my buddy that runs it.