So Close, No Matter How Far...

I'm a social media whore pretty much.  I get off to the idea that I can stay connected with people I can't normally see on a regular basis and especially those who live long distances from me.  This weekend opened my eyes a bit.  We drove down to the Texas coast which by normal standards is a hell of a road trip.  Only there was I able to meet up with old friends that live merely minutes away from me.  The question was raised on the beach as we caught up and reflected.  "Why do we have to drive 200 miles to hang out when we're normally 5 minutes away from each other?"  The past few weeks a friend of mine and sister in law spearheaded a reunion for all of the people that went to our high school.  The response was less than overwhelming.  Again, why?  Why is it ok to see each other in passing at a funeral or a hospital but we can't sacrifice enough time to get together for a meal or just to show our appreciation for each other?  We are so comfortable being one with each other via a social media site but not face to face.  I have friends on Facebook that I rarely ever spoke to and some people I flat out never met in person.  We are comfortable with divulging intimate details of our lives with strangers on the biggest open outlet known to man but ask them to come over for a drink and all of a sudden things are awkward.  It's time we stepped it up.  I genuinely care about my friends and if I have to organize a reunion every few months to see them, then thats what I'm gonna do.  Hell, if I have to see 800 pictures of your newborn every day, at least let me meet the little guy/girl.  I mean that in a smart ass way of course but I hope you get my point.  Life is short, peeps.  I much rather say goodbye to you with a hug and not while looking in a casket.  Until next time, I love you all, you're beautiful.

Peace, Love, and Confusion

I sit at my laptop a bit of a mess today as I woke up to some disturbing words aimed my way.  I know I'm not the best type of friend to have.  I hate schedules, appointments, and I hate rushing.  I have a gigantic family and several friends so it's impossible for me to spend as much time as I'd like with everyone I want to. My demeanor is simple, I don't like to have any enemies or have anyone with negative thoughts about me.  I do my best to be someone who is enjoyable to be around.  My favorite thing in the world is to make people laugh.  I've said a million times that life is too short to have any kind of negativity in my life.  So why did these words destroy my day before it started?  Because I felt that I'd failed.  I failed as a friend, a person, and I failed someone who I care about and respect.  My intentions are never to hurt anybody.  Maybe I've undermined how enjoyable I can be.  I don't know.  In retrospect it will teach me how to move forward and be everything that I want to be as a person.  A better husband, father, and most of all, friend.  I learn from things that happen to me and don't take things for granted.  I radiate love but at this moment I feel that inside me is a black heart.  They say time heals, in this case I pray it does.  I have so many regrets in life that I can't get back.  The only thing I can do is dust myself off and push forward.  Till next time, I love you all....you're beautiful.